Dear Friends,
The rat race, hustle culture, productivity hacks….Our culture is obsessed with striving and forcing and #CrushingIt. But that’s not what eclipse season is for. That’s not what meditation and mindfulness are for either. What happens when we let go, when we see what comes up, when we surrender and see it as sacred?
Table of Contents
Unfolding Your Way
There is no one right way to meditate. We have absorbed the idea that the only way to be a good meditator/yogi/ buddha is to sit cross-legged for 20 minutes or more and not have any thoughts, or to spend 100% of the time with our attention on the breath.
It's untrue. It's intimidating. It's a turn-off.
Yes, we desire the ability to sit for 20, 40, 60 minutes and be completely present and detached, undistracted by the thoughts arising in our minds. But we call it practice for a reason. Well, several reasons.
When we are engaged in formal meditation, we are practicing the skill of bringing our minds to the present. That's the practice. Noticing, observing, allowing.
The concern with getting attached to meditating perfectly or meditating the right way, is that it leads to judgement. We judge ourselves and fall into the trap of duality. A "good" session vs a "bad” session. Criticizing ourselves for not being able to meditate. The fact that we are noticing that focusing on the breath is a challenge, the fact that we are noticing that the mind is overactive, IS the practice.
Judgement is antithetical to the practice. Duality is antithetical to the practice. You didn't have a good meditation session or a bad meditation session. You had a meditation session. You meditated.
Your meditation"on the mat" or "on the cushion" is practice for your life off the mat.
The word "goals" in relation to mindfulness and meditation can be contradictory (our intention is to “be” not to “achieve”), but the "goal" isn't to sit like a perfect little monk and have no thoughts. That is the path.
And the path is about being present as life unfolds. It is about accepting and as opposed to rejecting. Our path is to allow our lives to unfold mindfully, and with awareness, and with intention, and purpose, and heartfulness, and loving-kindness, and compassion, and non-harming. It's to be able to be present in the presence of one another, it’s so we can be present to experience joy when it arises. It's to detach from the thoughts that cause suffering so we do not become our suffering. It is part of The Way.
In his book, Wherever You Go, There You Are, Jon Kabat-Zinn says "Meditation practice is the slow, disciplined work of digging trenches, of working in the vineyards, of bucketing out a pond. It is the work of moments and the work of a lifetime, all wrapped into one."
In the chapter "How Long Should I Practice?" Kabat-Zinn says this is one of the questions he receives most frequently. His response: "How should I know?"
When they began the Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction program in 1979, they asked their patients to meditate for 45 minutes a day. He goes on to explain the reason for this and then gets to the part that should give us all a sigh of relief:
"For those seeking balance in their lives, a certain flexibility of approach is not only helpful, it is essential. It is important to know that meditation has little to do with clock time. Five minutes of formal practice can be as profound or more so than forty-five minutes. The sincerity of your effort matters far more than elapsed time, since we are really talking about stepping out of minutes and hours and into moments, which are truly dimensionless and therefore infinite. So if you have the motivation to practice even a little, that is what is important. Mindfulness needs to be kindled and nurtured, protected from the winds of a busy life or a restless and tormented mind, just a small flame needs to be sheltered from strong gusts of air."
While they believed that by asking for more time, patients would give more time and therefore be able to integrate the practice into their lives more effectively, Kabat-Zinn goes on to acknowledge Real Life. This is why it’s important to emphasize that finding.
"Forming the intention to practice and then seizing a moment—any moment—and encountering it fully in your inward and outward posture, lies at the core of mindfulness."
Oftentimes beginners (in actuality we are all beginners; the idea is to approach meditation, mindfulness, life, with beginner’s mind) get stuck on meditating correctly. That’s not what we’re here for.
"Far better to adventure into longer periods of practice gradually on your own than never to taste mindfulness or stillness because the perceived obstacles were too great."
Try sitting for whatever amount of time you can commit to, and just watch what comes up.
One night last week I read the chapter "A What-is-my-Way Meditation?"
Over the course of a few months, I sat with potential names for this newsletter.
After much mulling, and attempts at avoiding repetition of other entities, "Unfolding Your Way" came to me. I've been working with the concept of allowing for the past 6 months or so, letting curiosity lead the way. And this seemed to fit.
The truly interesting question here is, "What exactly is my way?" meaning my "way" with a capital W. Rarely do we contemplate our life with this degree of probing. How frequently do we linger in such basic questions as "Who am I?", Where am I going?", "What path am I on?", "Is this the right direction for me?", “If I could choose a path now, in which direction would I head?", What is my yearning, my path?", "What do I truly love?"
As I was reading, I laughed out loud. The onomatopoeia "Hahahahaha" is literally written at the top of the page.
This is the third edition of Unfolding Your Way, and the first time in many years that I am reading this chapter.
In a live session on Insight Timer yesterday, “Sacred Healing Love,” with Davidji, he mentions five access points to meditation: mindfulness (breath awareness), mantra, visualization, body scan/ yoga nidra and a fifth I’m blanking on. It could be loving-kindness/compassion/metta; it could be journaling; it could be guided meditation; or—my favorite, movement. Regardless, the point is that there’s more than one…and you’ll find your way.
Contemplating "What is my Way?" is an excellent element to inject into our meditation practice. We don't have to come up with answers, nor think that there has to be one particular answer. Better not to think at all. Instead only persist in asking the question, letting any answers that formulate just come of themselves and go of themselves. As with everything else in the meditation practice, we just watch, listen, note, let be, let go, and keep generating the question, "What is my Way?", "What is my path?", "Who am I?"
The intention here is to remain open to not knowing...
The conundrum of rigidity is one that frequently comes up in mindfulness. We think we know where we want to go when we begin. But the trick is in remaining open.
Kabat-Zinn continues...
"Inquiry of this kind itself leads to new understandings and visions and actions. Inquiry itself takes on a life of its own after a while….Inquiry will wind up "doing you" rather than you doing it. This is a good way to find that path that lies closest to your heart."
"Can we be in touch with our own life unfolding?"
Sit with the Mess
Eclipse season can be a glorious time to surrender to what is. Because it’s a transformational time, we’re encouraged not to overwhelm and overschedule ourselves. We identify the priority (or priorities) and allow everything else to fall away. We rest. We turn toward ourselves and our most precious beloveds.
And in terms of personal growth, it’s an ideal time to let go. Let go of striving. Let go of the next conscious item on the transformation checklist. We accept where we are at the moment—wherever and however that is. Then we sit with the mess.
The beginning of Virgo season was the ideal time to get organized, get our ducks in a row, reframe our routines and rituals. Now eclipse season is here. It’s certainly not the time for perfection. Quite the opposite.
Eclipses offer transformation without us planning it or seeking it out. They’re powerful times of intense energy and shadowy light. We are ungrounded. We are groundless. We shift without shifting. We have the opportunity to see all of ourselves, unpolished. Messy.
Embrace the mess, then sit with it—with the uncertainty and the joy, with the discomfort and bliss, the highs and the lows.
There is nothing wrong. There are no problems to solve. No reactions to predict.
When we surrender, we make space and allow the questions and answers to arise. No forcing. No grasping and gripping. No orchestrating a symphony of perfection. There is a symphony of life and if we allow ourselves to be part of it instead of controlling it, we find the quiet joy of simply being.
One Tip at a Time
Expressive Writing
Dr. David Hanscom is just one of a number of doctors or surgeons who’ve left their practice to primarily focus on the mind-body connection. After making the connection between emotions and chronic pain, he started a practice that once-upon-a-time may have been called “Write-it-Out,” so that’s what I continue to call it today.
The point is that we hold our emotions in our bodies. And if we have an injury or pain or are recovering from surgery, those emotions “attach” to that wound, and perpetuate chronic pain. But we don’t need to have a wound for our emotions to harm us (hello, inflammation) and we don’t need to have a wound to start the practice. The goal is to get in the habit of expressing your emotions and releasing them.
Write-it-out is an excellent practice for overthinkers, middle-of-the-night wakers, those who “work” to manage their feelings, and anyone who values prevention over dis-ease. Dr. Hanscom originally recommended doing it twice per day, first thing in the morning and in the evening before bed. Should you decide to try it, you will need to find the just right time for you.
Here’s the practice:
Sit down with a sheet of paper. Then write, stream-of-conscious style, everything you’ve felt from the course of the day—all the emotions, the curse words, the joy, the full range of your feelings. No stopping, no thinking, no editing. Anywhere from 10 to 15 minutes will do.
IF you HAPPEN to have an insight—a potential solution, a great idea—jot that down in your journal separately. Have this set to the side if you find you might need it. This is not a time for analysis or problem solving or reflection. It’s to simply write out what comes up from that day.
Once your time is up—it is recommended to set a timer or use a piece of meditative music within the timeframe—rip up the piece of paper, and throw it in the garbage.
And that’s it. Ba-bye. Sweet release.
Fall Workshops at Mr. Rabbit- Save the Date(s)
Honoring the power of voice and our expression
( Mercury exalted in Virgo sextiles Jupiter exalted in Cancer + Mercury cazimi + Sun sextile Jupiter)
Join Lex and the GlobalGalLexi community to explore the power of voice and center authentic expression as a core component of joy and inner alignment. We’ll dive into the roles Mercury, and the Sacral and Throat chakras play in our attunement to self.
This activation features movement, guided meditation, expressive writing, conversations, and messages to our Self and others.
Includes mocktails and an analysis of Mercury in your birth chart.
$38 with sliding scale options
Wearing blue or orange is optional, but encouraged. Please bring a journal and pen/pencil. You will receive a pre-workshop survey upon registration.
NEW DATE: Thursday, September 25 - Reimagining Routines & Bringing in Balance #RomanticizingMyLife can be a way of living, not just a hashtag. The Universe offers us the ideal energy to reveal deeper levels of existence by bringing our daily routines into balance so they are infused with passion and joy. Can our days become more ritualistic? Can we transform our obligations to be more sacred?
Join Lex and the GlobalGalLexi community just after the Autumn Equinox to reflect on our everyday lives and explore where the ideal meets reality. We’ll center how we want to BE on the daily as a catalyst for what we want to do.
Thursday, October 9 - Care, Compassion & Abundance for All - We’ll explore the powerful Venus and Pluto transits asking us to focus on nurturing family, community, and social cohesion. [How do we inhabit our 4th, 6th, 9th, and 11th houses vs. how we desire to do so?]
Tuesday, October 28 - Death, Rebirth & Transformation in the Birth Chart - In the heart of Scorpio season and just before the spirit-oriented holidays, we’ll examine tending to our soul houses (4th, 8th, and 12th, and how our daily self-care (6th house) contributes to them.
Tuesday, November 18 - Nurturing a Rich Interior Life - Some of us were born tending our fantastical gardens of imagination and have no problem accessing them during dark times. Others were not. We’ll take a creative journey to explore how to create, cultivate, and rely on our inner Self, and develop a personal map for doing so. How do we cultivate internal rhythms we will listen to when they send us an answer?
Tuesday, December 2 - Harnessing Saturn - In preparation for Capricorn season, we’ll consider how to work with Saturn, the planet of boundaries, lessons, structure, and reality checks. Saturn challenges us, but also creates the container for our expansion, so no better time than right before our winter reflections.
Thursday, December 18 - The Winter of Yes....And. With magic in mind, winter can be a delicious time for reflection and renewal. When we embrace the rhythms of nature and our ancestors, using the cold and darkness to restore our bodies and nurture our souls, we align with our intuition. We emerge for spring with clear, embodied intentions.
Workshops will be posted ASAP. Most will begin between 5:00pm and 5:30 and last for 1.5 to 2 hours. All sessions are intention-forward and include journaling, mindfulness, movement, visualization, and self-exploration.
Packages Promise Consistent Coaching
I’ve developed several packages that include a mix of multiple coaching sessions. There is no one-size-fits-all method for cultivating mindfulness and nurturing clarity, and that’s why I customize each journey to the co-creator in front of me. It would be an honor to work alongside you to map your pathway.
The Heavenly Bodies This Week
Full Blood Moon Lunar Eclipse in Pisces
Pisces is the home of the soul. The 12th house of the zodiac, it’s the final sign, the end, and where the subconscious, unconscious and spirituality reside. Yes, your individual 12th house may be under a different sign, but this is the general zodiac, where Sunday’s full blood moon lunar eclipse is happening. Eclipses happen at the nodes, and the North Node has been in Pisces since September 2024 and will stay there through 2026. The North Node is a point of expansion—it highlights where we are insatiable. We are hungry for more: mysticism, imagination, creativity, spirituality, soul.
During eclipse season, we allow transformation to occur; no forcing, no striving. We dance with our shadow selves instead of trampling over them. We reflect and integrate.
To do so effectively, you must care for yourself. Rest, hydrate, exercise, ground, touch grass, journal, be gentle with yourself, and practice loving-kindness and compassion.
Sitting with this eclipse is Saturn, the greater malefic. The planet of responsibility, self-discipline, time, karma, challenges, lessons and most importantly, boundaries. It’s the planet of reality checks and ‘no’. Boundaries are essential when Pisces is involved, and boundaries are essential during eclipse season, as are your priorities. Whittle down your priorities to the bare essentials and allow space for the unknown. Cont…
Last Call: Saturn Retrograde in Pisces
Saturn is back in Pisces! Heeeyyyyy! For some of us this cause celebre, for others it may be the harbinger of another challenging five to six months (lookin’ at you Saturn-in-Pisces-return folks). BUT—it doesn't have to be. Saturn was in Pisces for a little more than two years (beginning in 2023 through May 2025), and during that time, we would have been shaped by its lessons; it is after all, the planet of reality checks, karma, boundaries, discipline, and responsibility.
Depending what house Pisces is for you, this is either welcome or cringe.
Turning back 'round to that ‘but’, the gift that an outer planet going retrograde gives us after it enters a new sign for the first time is that we get to take our reflections and reviews into account and see how we can best make the most of the final wrap-up in the previous sign.
In Pisces, Saturn brings us structure. It creates the container for our ideals and dreams. Here until February 13, 2026, the softer side of Saturn is your co-creator as you complete any projects, plans, or manifestations you've had in the works since March of 2023. Cont…
All the Heady Details - Mercury in Virgo
Mercury is hoooommmmee! Out of retrograde, rotating forward, and now exalted in Virgo—this is information flow vibes. It’s intellectual processes vibes. This is clear, direct messaging with details intact. Chaos into order, you got it!
The shadowy energy of eclipse season may be hovering about, but clarity in communications and problem-solving shall abound. It's a delicious time to manifest, express, and voice your needs, desires, and most importantly your boundaries (it is after all also eclipse season). Cont…
Another Release: The South Node Conjunctions
September 10th and 11th
Prepare for transition. Just before a few days of flirty, bubbly fun and clear comms, we enter several points of transformation. The first is the full blood moon lunar eclipse in Pisces on Sunday, September 7. Next we have two conjunctions with the South Node: the sun and Mercury. The South Node is a place of letting go. It’s where the solar eclipse occurs at the second Virgo new moon on September 22nd.
Some things we just need not carry with us. So Sol and Mercury take care of that for us on September 10 and 11th respectively when each conjoins the South Node – all are in Virgo. The South Node in Virgo means we release the Virgo things: perfectionism, over-analyzing, and criticism, but we may also lose data, details, systems, and order. What a blessing to let go of fear and control. And while the order we know may be lost, the outer planets are bringing a new order, and that is much-needed.
Clarity Incoming: Cazimis and Sextiles
September 12 and 13
In the middle of Eclipse Season, we receive a blessing. Well, many blessings wrapped up beautifully into two glorious days.
On September 12th and 13th, we are gifted with a Mercury cazimi.
The sun and Mercury will be conjunct—together at the same degree—in Virgo. Cazimi means “heart of the sun,”and implies crystal clear clarity. A Mercury cazimi is especially potent because communication and the flow of information is Mercury’s domain. So we receive downloads and insights and breakthroughs, AND we can express ourselves with intention, purpose, clarity. Wins all around.
The other two events on the 12th and 13th are sextiles to Jupiter, which is exalted (a Universal VIP) in Cancer. Because Mercury and the Sun are at the same degree, (where Mercury is also exalted) in Virgo, they will both make a sextile to Jupiter over those two days. When a planet is exalted, it can do its best work. It can help us in the best way possible.
It’s time to lock in.
If you NEED to have significant conversations during eclipse season, these are the two days for it.
Show Up: Venus Sextile Mars
September 15
If you don’t love a Venus sextile Mars, do you even believe in anything?—Particularly love, romance, passion, sex, play, flirtation, or lust?
Venus in Leo sextile Mars in Libra is one of the hottest aspects we can get, so make the most of it—even though it’s a Monday. Hell, if you can carry Friday and Saturday’s gorgeous energy through the weekend, you have a sizzling and embodied few days in a row.
Mercury in Virgo Opposing Saturn Retrograde in Saturn
September 17
Major cock-blocker moment here — at least in terms of creativity and expression. A Saturn opposition indicates restriction, constriction, and tension.
Although Mercury in Virgo is exalted and does its best work here otherwise, Saturn will reign that in. Mercury’s in charge of the flow of information: communication, transportation, technology. Best to write a draft and save it for later. Saturn’s energy in Pisces is connected to the full moon Lunar eclipse in Pisces, and it’s the ultimate reminder to find the sweet spot between surrender and release, and boundaries and self-discipline.
On the Horizon
Opting Out of Urgency, Sarah Tacy | I love a free workshop. And while many of them are set up to tempt you to take a full course you pay for, those I’ve taken lately give you plenty to work with in the free workshop. In this 3-day (1.5 hours each day) workshop, trauma-informed somatic guide Sarah Tacy will provide somatic tools for resourcing the nervous system. I’m signed up; register here.
Meditation guru Tara Brach teamed up with NICABM (National Institute for the Clinical Application of Behavioral Meditation) for a free video workshop about grief, loss, and healing. Watch for free here.
I highly recommend signing up for the Hay House newsletter. Recently they honored the legacies of Dr. Wayne Dyer (self-development guru) and Louise Hay (inspirational teacher and self-help pioneer). In it were two lTheovely quotes to sit with:
Dr. Wayne Dyer: “Don’t die with your music still in you.”
From Louise Hay: “You’ve been criticizing yourself for years and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.”
Red Flags vs Growth Areas: How to distinguish and navigate them | I also highly recommend the Gottman’s newsletter (John Gottman of “The Relationship Cure” face) or following them on IG or elsewhere. In this article they break down the difference between red flags and growth areas, “Learn when to walk away and when to use the opportunity to grow.” Worth the read.
I struggle with letting go of things. How can I move on for a calmer life? The Guardian advice columnist Eleanor Gordon-Smith writes that closure isn’t always necessary – or possible – for moving on. Read for response for a unique and insightful perspective.
From Conflict to Connection: Jimmy Knowles (of Jimmy on Relationships) is hosting a free live event with Matthias Barker to address the 4 most common conflict patterns couples fall into (and how to get out of them). September 8th at 11am or 7pm CDT. Register for free here.
The 2026 United Astrology Conference is September 3-9 in Chicago. Earlybird registration is happening now, and the keynote speaker is esteemed astrologer Chani Nicholas. If you’re into it, now’s the time to signup.
I also teach workplace culture facilitation (ahem, belonging and inclusion) for a non-profit with speaker, author, and journalist Celeste Headlee. My next section of live virtual classes begins October 8, and the self-paced course with recorded classes starts October 14. Check it out if you’re looking to make change in your organization. I teach all Level 1 classes.
Reflection of the Week
As you start to walk on the way, the way appears. Clarity doesn't come before action. It comes from action.
I look forward to seeing you at a workshop or in a session soon.
Peace & loving kindness 💚
Lex